This is definitely bordering, uh, totally crossing the line of TMI (too much information, for you non-texters), but I cannot believe what just happened.
My most favoritest, most comfortable bra is not padded, so occasionally, if the shirt I'm wearing requires it, I will put bandaids on the, uh, protruding parts of uh, that part of my anatomy ("Where the milk came out, ewwww!" as Gracie likes to say -- so much for the sweet sweet memories of being her one and only world). Anyhoo, bandaids. Right. Ok, so today I put on bandaids. I don't know who I was trying to impress. Or not impress. But I did. I was taking them off, because later on this evening I intend to plan passion (again with the TMI) and you know how bandaid covered rhymes with ripples turn a guy on -- and as I was taking them off, a big hunk of skin pulled off with it! AHHHHKKKKCCHHHK!!! IT HURTS. A lot.
Also unbelievably, I also just tried to take a picture of my gaping wound. Ok, gaping is a little extreme. But it IS a wound. On my rhymes with GOOBIE! And then I thought, I best not put a picture of my goobie (regardless of how much or little I zoom) on this here internet for all the world to see. DELETE DELETE DELETE. Because then some random guy at a cocktail party (because you know we go to so many cocktail parties) could say, "I've seen your goobie!!!!" Only he would have tried to say the real word, but couldn't because of all of the cocktails he had just consumed.
I really do need to get out more.
If any man is still reading this, you may not blame me for the TMI session into my life. You were warned. Sorry, ladies, I should've warned you too.
12 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAAAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!!
ahem.
I am so sorry you got hurt!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHHHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
ahem.
Okay, my goobie hurts just thinking about your owie. I was at a party once and someone smoking a cigarette bumped up against me and improbably the cherry fell off into the pocket of my shirt and burned through to that area. It hurt for weeks and I still have a scar, like 18 years later. Not quite the same thing, but just an amen, sister, I feel your pain.
I totally understand your foresight - I'm with you 100%! You never know when a completely harmless picture of a gaping breast wound is going to re-surface. Odds are it would come out at your PTA meeting or Church Social or some other really awkward time. At least, that's my kind of luck...
Imagine that but 100 times worse...yep- it's happened to me! Only mine was when the girls were taped up with athletic tape for my low backless wedding dress. you know how you are suppose to use the spray adhesive...well make sure you use it because my mom did not and well, the wedding night was a painful one along with the honeymoon in Mexico where there is salt water!
sorry it happened to you too!
Oh...my...Kristi, I am so sorry! I am cringing and cringing over here.
HEE HEEE HA HA HA!!!! Ohhh that is hilarious!
Just stick a nursing pad in there, silly! Works for me! (Although I am not well-endowed, so perhaps I don't need as much assistance in the anti-protrusion area.) I am totally buying you those little pasty things that celebrities use...
Wow! That one caught me by surprise. I don't even have a comment ... except to say ... that's a whole lot of thinking you're doing when you're getting dressed. What a planner you are!!!
Why are you so funny? seriously?
Sorry about the wound.
I went to Lalapalooza in high school and saw a girl wearing nothing but band-aids on top. The look could come back???
I never would have thought of that. I just cross my arms a lot.
Sorry for your pain...the bandaid think is actually something we used to do in ballet for our performances...you know, to keep the headlights off :)
I'm beside myself with laughter... (and of course sympathy)... but mostly laughter... and it's hard to get past this when you are a "visual" person... yikes and ouch!
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